When I started WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE, I had no other choice. It’s that simple. I had ideas that needed a home, and I wanted to write. I knew those things would keep swirling formlessly in my orbit unless I created a container to hold and nurture them. I wanted a place to explore them outside of mainstream online publishing’s editorial constraints and biases.
I put the link—nervously—on social media and emailed it to 40 people I love. The moment I launched, my doubts went wild.
What if they think I’m stupid? Who am I to think my voice deserves space and attention? What if no one reads it? What if publishing a weekly essay that feels worthwhile is not sustainable?
Fast forward two years later, and I am a little choked up to tell you that it turned out to be sustainable, after all, and on top of that, it has been the most rewarding and life-giving thing I’ve done.
Being present in this space for two years has taught me a lot. It clarifies how I want to show up in the world and how I want to serve. It shows me that following the path of pleasure and joy helps me string together a meaningful life. It demonstrates that it is possible to carve out microcosms of the world we want to live in, inhabit them, and invite others to join.
This is my annual pledge drive—a tradition I started last year—and I have a few things to share about why, on this newsletter’s second birthday, I am once again asking for your support.
For me, WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE is an act of love. I have spent approximately 1500 hours on it over two years, or 10-15 hours per week.
Keeping this project healthy and generative involves money no matter what. Like everyone, I have to focus on work that pays, and sponsorship provides an opportunity for you to invest in this space if it is something you enjoy. It also opens the door for reciprocal exchange between us.
I am floored each week by your messages, heart-clicking, sharing, and the generous space you offer me in your inboxes, brains, and hearts. I notice all of it and am deeply grateful. Sponsorships boost my income as a writer, so today I am making the annual request.
Will you join me? I would be so honored if you pledged your support for another year.
Multiple sponsorship levels are available! All gestures of support are appreciated. If you can’t sponsor at this time, you can also help WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE grow by inviting a friend to sign up or sharing essays online.
The tech bro overlords have conditioned us to expect free content online. Why? Because they profit from our attention. Content created for the internet attracts attention, and attention attracts money.
But the money doesn’t go to the people creating content. It goes to the tech bro overlords.
Making a conscious choice to pay artists and writers for online media tips the power balance back towards the people, away from the overlords. Here we are, creating new economies driven by something more thoughtful and meaningful than shareholder profit. Here we are, paying for things that add unquantifiable value to our lives. Here we are, creating a microcosm of a world we’d like to live in.
On an episode of NPR’s 1A about newsletters, feminist media mogul Ann Friedman said she is glad platforms like Substack are normalizing paying writers for their work. She put it like this:
For people who have been consuming media only in the digital era, it might not be engrained that media is a thing you pay for. I am excited about [newsletters]…resetting this norm: That writing is not free. Especially great writing is not free. Writing that arrives regularly is not free.
Supporting WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE helps create an emerging, visionary landscape in which artists and writers can create things that are not beholden to ads and the attention economy. On a personal level, it helps me link my calling to my livelihood, and keeps me afloat.
The purpose of WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE has always been to ask big questions and help orient myself and others around the pressing issues of our time. When I started it, I had no idea we would navigate a pandemic together. But we did, and we are. Who knows what’s next?
As this project becomes increasingly viable financially, I would like to bring an editor on board. I also want to expand the conversations about life’s big questions—in written, audio, or live formats. Every sponsorship helps me get there!
I remain committed to the following:
Facilitating conversations around life’s big questions
Holding space for the beautiful human inadequacy and honesty we bring to those conversations
Highlighting topics and ~feelings~ that aren’t prioritized in mainstream outlets
Exploring growth, healing, pleasure, and wellbeing as critical components of our lives
Making meaning through art, relationships, spirituality, shared experience, work, and civic duty
The tumultuous state of the world makes it clear that shared spaces for grounding ourselves and seeking clarity will be critical going forward. My hope is that WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE can be one of them.
Behind the Scenes: Why I Collect Payments on Square
Substack has a subscriptions feature, but when I introduced sponsorship, I decided not to use it for a few reasons. Most of all, I wanted to offer tiered payment options starting at $15 / year. Substack does not offer that flexibility, and it was important to me that paying for WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE remain accessible. Secondly, Substack’s model encourages writers to create extra content for paid subscribers, but I don’t want to make needless noise or create content only meant to incentivize subscriptions.
I want to stick with a publishing schedule that feels generative for me, and hopefully, for you. If at some point it makes sense to use Substack’s model, which would give them a portion of sponsorship income, I remain open to it.
In year one, WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE appeared 50 times! We explored perfectionism, anxiety, comfort, and when feeling okay is enough.
We talked about poetry as respite, the potential for America’s healing, stuffing our gifts into boxes, and, at the very beginning, the sacred nature of the morning.
You seemed to particularly enjoy the time my guardian angel appeared in the form of Gillian Welch and when I threw up in my professor’s cat bowl. I compared the shock of the pandemic to New Yorkers saying goodbye.
In year two, WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE appeared 51 times! Let’s Talk invited regular (brilliant, wonderful) people to explore universal themes. I wrote about becoming a poll worker in the South, marriage and partnership, and tending your inner flame. We explored your relationship with joy in 2020 and had tea with our struggles.
You and I had the same favorites this spring: Something for the fatherless on Father’s Day and magical stories of post-quarantine reconnection.
We all needed permission for aimlessness and being “too” sensitive. We embraced pleasure as an act of resistance. We laughed through our grief and navigated the impossible task of holding joy against tragedy and ease against tension in a late-pandemic world.
Finally, we looked to the ocean to find the most resilient parts of ourselves.
I am excited about the year ahead, whatever beauty and struggle it may hold. I am so glad you are here. Thank you, as always, for reading my work.
With gratitude,
LM
Sponsorship looks like—
$15: That one essay you wrote stuck with me. Have a cocktail! — $.23 / email
$33: Forget cocktails. I’m sponsoring at the new-book-from-an-indie-level. — $.51 / email
$50: I love being here and want to invest three quarters in every essay you write. — $.78 / email
$100: I love you, I freaking love you! Go forth and prosper. — $1.56 / email.
I love this so much! Also love the title channeling Bernie! Thank you for bringing me powerfully refined insights every single week.